3 months.
Three months of bridal, get fit, tan, and tone before the big day! Why does every bride insist on losing weight before their wedding? Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Adkins, South Beach, even the cookie diet give hope to all those betrothed to the fitted, strapless dress. Believe me, the list of diet plans are endless and I've done them all! In fact, this last week I created my own combination of South Beach/ popcorn/ chai tea diet. I call it the Miami Movie Latte diet. Brilliant.
In my dreams, or Marsi's World as my friends refer to it, I will be a size 2, complete with boob job and tummy tuck. I will pause outside the chapel door, before gliding, without jiggle, down the isle in absolute skinny perfection. After seeing my rockin, hot bod, my sweetie will pick his jaw up off the floor, just before he faints across the alter. Right?
You know, it's not like our guys are Shallow Hal and haven't seen our true bodies. I mean, I know I must look like Kate Beckinsale through those goggles but when the goggles come off Matt still loves me, for me. Nevertheless, all confidence is forgotten when I put on that strapless dress, complete with complimentary back fat! Back to Jillian's 30 day shred for me! http://www.jillianmichaels.com/
Along with Jillian's grueling work-out routine, I'm doing Zumba! I flippin LOVE Zumba! It's a great work-out and so much fun. For those of you who may not know, it's a combination of Latin dance moves, like the merengue, cumbia, and salsa, along with other rhythmic dance moves. I'm taking classes at Studio 57 http://www.studio57fitness.com/ with the talented instructors Bren, Karen, and others.
However, all of this exercise doesn't really matter if I continue to cheat on my diet, oh wait... I mean healthy living lifestyle program. In 2010, diet it a bad word, but come on, really... let's just call it what it is. Seriously, do you know of a "healthy living lifestyle program" that allows you to eat Burger King croissant sandwiches? Yeah, me either. But that is precisely what I did yesterday.
Confessions of the slightly chubby (sounds better than fat) bride-to-be;
My daughter's school is near the fitness center. After dropping her off at 7:40, I decided to wait in the gym's parking lot until class started at 8:30. I had my TIME mags ready to keep me occupied, and then it occurred to me.... I have panty lines. Yep, I was wearing tights with full coverage Vicki's (Victoria Secret) briefs. I forgot to put on the appropriate panty choice for tight clothing before leaving the house! I didn't want to drive all the way back home just to turn around and come back. What's a girl to do? I must take the panties off.... but where. The gym wasn't open yet, my car does not have tinted windows, and there are not a lot of businesses open at 7:45 in the morning.
After contemplating the problem, I came up with this TERRIBLE solution. Drive across the street to Burger King, use their restroom to change, and return to gym parking lot. Now, I don't like using a business restroom and not purchasing something. I think that is rude, and of course, I can't be rude. I approach the counter to buy a bottle of water, and walked away with a bottle of water and...
a croissant sandwich.
OK I think, mistake made but my dear friend Natalie will meet me soon and we'll half it. Then I ate it, ALL of it. Immediately, I felt regret, and entered the gym with a loaded belly, a guilty conscious, and a happy heart. Happy because I burned off the calories of the croissant sandwich in Zumba. I'm not perfect, but I'm trying, and that's half the battle.
Keep trying,
This; dear friend, makes me love you all the more.
ReplyDeleteI giggled, a lot when I read this! Only you my dear, ONLY YOU!
ReplyDeleteAh Marsi wisdom. So refreshing!
ReplyDelete